


"JOHN!"

by Rene_Dullahan



Series: When I LARP with my Girlfriend [1]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Chat rooms, Collaboration, Confused Sherlock, Crack, Fun with my girlfriend, John Is So Done, LARPing, M/M, Misunderstandings, OMC likes to screw with people, Specifically Sherlock
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-23
Updated: 2016-12-23
Packaged: 2018-09-11 12:20:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8979448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rene_Dullahan/pseuds/Rene_Dullahan
Summary: Imagine Sherlock, John, and OMC on Skype. Now imagine that OMC like to screw with people; specifically, Sherlock.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Edvin A/N: This was originally written in google chat. Basically, Pan and I ended up LARPing halfway through a conversation of ours, and this happened.
> 
> Rene: (And since Dev ‘accidentally’ forgot to put this in)
> 
> We don't own Sherlock, John Watson, or the person at the end of the story (BBC), but Jason Singer is all mine (Rene). I hope you enjoy our randomness!
> 
> Dev: I didn’t forget!!! I just… try not to think about it!
> 
> Rene: sure…

 

* * *

 

**Unknown243 has joined the chat**

**Sherlock Holmes has joined the chat**

Sherlock Holmes: John, is that you?

Unknown243: I’m not Watson.

Sherlock Holmes: … Did you dubiously acquire his phone, then?

Unknown243: … No.

Sherlock Holmes: Hmmm… you undoubtedly have. I must inform John at once.

**Sherlock Holmes has left the chat**

Unknown243: I'm not John. But DAMN, is the good doctor good in bed!

**Sherlock Holmes has joined the chat**

Sherlock Holmes: Excuse me?! JOHN!!!!! I REQUIRE AN EXPLANATION THIS VERY INSTANT!!!!!!!!!!!

**JohnH. Watson has joined the chat**

**“Unknown243” has changed their username to “JayBird47”**

JohnH. Watson: Yes, Sherlock?

Sherlock Holmes: Have you been in bed-company with any besides myself?! *Stern glare*

JohnH. Watson: In a sexual way? No. But, an old army buddy needed a place to crash so I let him take my bed.

Sherlock Holmes: Hmph. Fine. But I'm warning you; I don't share well, and expect full compensation.

JayBird47: What kind of compensation does Johnny need to give you? Or is that just your way of saying you want cum-pany tonight?

Sherlock Holmes: "Johnny" needs to give me quite a bit. Preferably enough that I cannot walk the next day.

JohnH. Watson: SHERLOCK! TMI!

Sherlock Holmes: What do you mean, "too much information"?

**“JohnH. Watson” has changed their username to “Sherlock has shamed me”**

Sherlock Holmes: Oh, very mature, John.

**“Sherlock has shamed me” has changed their username to “JohnH. Watson”**

JayBird47: Soo… is Johnny any good these days? 'Cause back in the army, he was pretty popular with the ladies and the fellas.

Sherlock Holmes: JOOOHHHN!!!!!

JohnH. Watson: What?

Sherlock Holmes: Do me a favor and explain what your "buddy", here, was speaking of.

JohnH. Watson: … You automatically thought about sex, didn't you?

Sherlock Holmes: *pouts* I can’t help it! You've been good for 47 hours, 3 minutes, and 45 seconds.

Sherlock Holmes: Make that 46.

JohnH. Watson: Look, Jason has an unfortunate habit of saying thing that can be taken different ways depending on the context. He probably meant to ask if I am still as good a doctor as I was back in the army.

Sherlock Holmes: Is that what you meant?

JayBird47: Well that, or to ask if Johnny still has magic hands. But, I now know that he only keeps _cum-pany_ with you.

Sherlock Holmes: John, I am, regrettably, thoroughly confused.

JohnH. Watson: Welcome to the mind of one Jason Singer.

Sherlock Holmes: Hmph. Not even my mind palace is that demented.

JayBird47: So glad I have confused another Holmes brother!

Sherlock Holmes: Argh. Well, you have not nearly the intelligence required to do much else. Please use your minimalist IQ to arrange these two words into a commonly used phase: OFF FUCK.

JayBird47: Kinky! Of course I want to be apart of a threesome with my old partner!

Sherlock Holmes: JOOOOOOHHHNNN!!!!!!!! I AM THIS CLOSE TO CALLING IN A BOMB-INVOLVING FAVOR FROM MYCROFT VIA BLACKMAIL!!!!

JayBird47: But we could have soo much fun together!

JayBird47: 0:)

Sherlock Holmes: … What are your coordinates? I have the bomb plane ready.

JayBird47: I'm with Johnny.

JayBird47: In his bed.

JayBird47: Naked.

Sherlock Holmes: !!!!

JayBird47: After the best massage of my life.

Sherlock Holmes: John. I must inform you that I am getting rather jealous. *eyebrow twitch*

JayBird47: Dude, chill. *rolls eyes* Not like he's fucking me into the mattress every night. 'Sides, I'm already in a relationship with a mighty fine fella.

Sherlock Holmes Good.

JayBird47: Besides, Johnny and I broke up a long time ago.

Sherlock Holmes: What? How long ago!? TELL ME!!!!!

JayBird47: Chill man, we were in high school, we dated. He joined the army as a doctor. I joined up as a sniper. When he was discharged we broke up and the rest is history.

Sherlock Holmes: Stay that way. On an entirely unrelated note; I've heard you like guns. Most snipers do, I suppose. Perhaps I should take you shooting sometime? *innocent but feral smile*

JayBird47: Only if I'm not the target. And I want a run with an AK-47, couple of GLOCKs, and M24 sniper rifle.

Sherlock Holmes: Never mind, then.

JayBird47: But...but..but… John your boyfriend's being mean to me!

Sherlock Holmes: NO I'M NOT!!! JOHN, DON'T LISTEN TO HIM!!!!!!!

JohnH. Watson: Sherlock, you mentioned guns to a man who spent the majority of his life reading about, handling, and fixing guns. That vary same man was the best sniper in the army without using a scope and using a subpar gun… it's your own fault. Oh, and you’re sleeping on the couch for three days.

Sherlock Holmes: *whines* Jo-oohhnn!!!

JohnH. Watson: Nope. Not doing this. I'm going back to bed.

Sherlock Holmes:  JOHN!!!! I WON'T KEEP HUMAN HEADS IN THE MICROWAVE FOR A WEEK IF YOU HAVE PITY!!! PROMISE!!!!

JohnH. Watson: You’re going to have to give me a better offer than that, Love.

Sherlock Holmes: A MONTH THEN!! AND NO HUMAN THUMBS IN THE CRISPER!!!

JohnH. Watson: Nope.

Sherlock Holmes: And, for another WEEK, I won't point out how Molly's boyfriend is gay.

JohnH. Watson: Nada. Nope. Negative.

Sherlock Holmes: I also won't tell her that he is a secret crime-ringleader, by the alias of "Moriarty" and has been plotting to kill me for months now.

JohnH. Watson: WHAT?!

Sherlock Holmes: Did I not tell you?

JohnH. Watson: NO!!

Sherlock Holmes: Oops.

Sherlock Holmes: He's also the one that put the spy-cameras in the bedroom by the way.

JayBird47: *ROTFLMAO*

JohnH. Watson: THERE WERE CAMERAS IN THE BEDROOM!?

JayBird47: *ROTFLMAO*

JohnH. Watson: STOP LAUGHING, JAY!!!!1!!!1!!!

Sherlock Holmes: Oh. You didn’t know.

Sherlock Holmes: I thought you just had an exhibition kink.

JayBird47: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

JohnH. Watson: NO, Sherlock, I didn’t know!!!!

JayBird47: HEHEHEHEHEHE

JohnH. Watson: And I don’t have an exhibition kink!!!1

**“JohnH. Watson” has changed their username to “Sherlock I’m coming to kill you”**

**“Sherlock I’m coming to kill you” has changed their username to “JohnH. Watson”**

**JohnH. Watson has left the chat**

Sherlock Holmes: … I’m assuming that the username change wasn’t accidental.

JayBird47: HA

Sherlock Holmes: Oh, there he [98Raih’th asd fk;a sdfkjaetu4hjds xdfgsdfg2

JayBird47: Sherlock?

**Sherlock Holmes has left the chat**

**n0tyourhousekeeper_dear has joined the chat**

N0tyourhousekeeper_dear: Oh dear, it’s gotten rather noisy upstairs.’

JayBird47: LOL

**JayBird47 has left the chat**

**n0tyourhousekeeper_dear has left the chat**

 

**The End ?**

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Comment if you want us to make more. you can find me at https://pandora-helion.tumblr.com/ I have just started posting about my stories, and even then I won't be a thing I do often. so be warned.


End file.
